If you truly care about making a woman come, you shouldn’t just fuck her and hope for the best.

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Photo by We-Vibe WOW Tech on Unsplash

When people find out I write about sex and manage my own publication dedicated to Sex Education and Sexuality, they react differently. Some get really surprised and excited and ask a lot of questions about my work and things I get to see and read about, others, on the other hand, get worried because suddenly, they don’t know what to expect from having sex with me.

Back in January, when I brought home a guy I went on a few dates with, he frequently asked me whether or not I’m going to write about him and our sex in my articles. …


Life is too short to not have all the sex and fun you deserve. And it sure does help you explore your sexuality better as long as you’re safe.

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Ketut Subiyanto: Pexels

A few months ago, I found myself in a rather dark place. I wasn’t depressed the way I usually get, but life suddenly became useless without a drink or a pill. It happened soon after a guy I’d been seeing for the first time after my last serious relationship had left me for another woman just when I started opening up to him and felt like we both began falling in love with each other. A day later, I found out that he was seeing someone else. Someone more suitable for him. Prettier perhaps. …


Though I absolutely saw it coming

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Andrea Piacquadio: Pexels

“It’s going to be so dark every morning soon,” I typed with barely enough strength to stretch out my thumb and press it against my phone. I was reflecting on the fact that it’s now autumn in Russia and Winter is coming. My friend replied, “I’m envious. Sometimes I stay up all night just to enjoy the darkness.” It felt like we were on the same page, but so far away from each other.

It came on suddenly, I felt very weak, had a slight fever and stuffy nose with a minor cough, and so I started treating myself for a common cold. …


Is it really that romantic to date a writer?

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Photo by Nayanika Mukherjee on Unsplash

There seems to be some kind of prejudice around dating creative genius people, whether it’s a writer, poet, painter, artist, or professor of some sort.

Our culture has been romanticizing artists for ages, despite them often living abusive, toxic, problematic, and miserable lives, full of betrayals, difficult emotions, and pain. Considering that romanticism, I can see the sentiment that might be so appealing to the young.

But is it always necessarily hot to date an artist, specifically a writer?

When I was eighteen, I fell in love with a young talented artist. He was barely older than me, but he’d already created significant paintings — more accomplishment than I had made in my life. Back then, I was obsessed with the mystery around these artsy people, and soon enough, I found myself working as a model in a famous Imperial Academy of Arts. …


I always tried to see the beauty in my curves and shapes and put it out there. Was it now considered somewhat slutty and problematic, as she described it in her article?

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Photo by We-Vibe WOW Tech on Unsplash

My date and I were sitting in a cozy bar with dim lighting and candles around the tables last night as my phone kept lighting up every other second. As a bartender, he was telling me about all the nuances of my favorite drinks from the bar I love going to when he suddenly looked at my phone that kept ringing and lighting up.

‘Is everything okay?’ — he asked.

‘Umm, yes, it’s just… the entire Twitter’s defending my ass… literally.’

You see, that morning I woke up from the ream of messages from my fellow Medium writers and followers, talking about the same article some woman wrote here on Medium. …


It’s probably not going to be sexy

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Polina Zimmerman: Pexels

The first moment I saw him in a fancy bar, I thought to myself, “We’re definitely going to have sex.” He was that rare type of older man — stylish, well-groomed but not in a fussy way, charming and kind; he was a talented chef who traveled the entire world before ending up in the same place as me.

We hit it off right away. He made me some delicious snacks to go along with my endless drinks, we kept smiling at each other and flirting until he came to me and asked about my plans for the upcoming day.

I’d forgotten how straightforward some men can be. There were no games, no Instagram exchange, or doubt. …


What really makes someone good at sex if not the right person who can fully appreciate and match with you in the bedroom?

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Photo by We-Vibe WOW Tech on Unsplash

I often hear people describing someone as “really good” at sex. Is it the certain skills some of us enhance better than others? The attitude? Confidence? Body shape? No, definitely not the last one.

When I think about my previous partners, I can сondifently say they were good in bed. But can all of the other women they slept with say the same about them? Can all the guys I slept with even say that about me?

Some people can be inexperienced or awkward in sex, some can be really self-conscious and uptight because of that. Some, though still really skilled, are greedy and selfish in bed. …


What some women mean when they say they like it rough.

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Anna Shvets: Pexels

It’s not a secret that many women like it rough. They get off from the pain, practice BDSM with their partners, and constantly push their limits. However, there’s a fair share of women who, sometimes unknowingly, prefer the illusion of rough sex, fantasize about ‘being taken’ and dominated yet don’t want to experience actual pain that comes with it.

A few days ago I met up with a male friend of mine. The kind of friend who knows everything about my sex life and is never shy about sharing every detail about his own. …


The psychology behind female rape fantasies.

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Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash

I was passionate about sex way before I entered my teenagehood. It all started with curiosity and soon enough escalated into a deep self-exploration. Seemed like simple masturbation wasn’t enough anymore — I wanted to know what else is out there that might not only feel just as good but even brighter and stronger.

Like every kid that age, I tried every object in my house that was more or less suitable enough for my new hobby as well as all masturbation guides and ideas the internet can suggest. But it still wasn’t enough. There had to be something bigger on the table that I haven't yet tried. …


How do we define consent within a close relationship where all boundaries are seemingly vague?

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Photo by Womanizer WOW Tech on Unsplash

Throughout my life, I dealt with different types of men. Some of them were persuasive and pushy, others — more respectful — but still had some work to do. It wasn’t until 5 months ago when I accidentally went out with a friend of my ex-boyfriend that I felt 100% safe and respected with a man I barely knew.

I didn’t know if we agreed to meet as old friends or as something more but back then, I didn’t mind getting drunk with someone besides myself. We had a few drinks. I had some more. And there, I was once again at the stage where you could barely make any decisions. The stage when men try to take advantage of women and go to town with all the techniques and charms they’ve learned over the years from college friends. …

About

Julia Beaudett

aspiring alcoholic trying to navigate the modern world of dating | support my writing or coffee addiction: ko-fi.com/juliabeaudett

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